Staying Calm When You Don’t Feel Calm

Staying Calm When You Don't Feel Calm - When your baby cries for long periods of time it can be very frustrating for you and create feelings of anger or resentment towards your baby.Your baby cries. That is normal.  Yet, when your baby cries for long periods of time it can be very frustrating for you and create feelings of anger or resentment towards your baby.  It is important to remember that these feelings are normal and that most people have gone through a time where they have felt that way.

When you start to have feelings of anger and frustration towards your baby, that is a sign telling you it is time to take a break from your child so you can calm down.  Need some ideas of ways to calm down?  Look at the following list and pick one or two that may work for you:

  • Listen to music
  • Take a warm bath
  • Watch a favorite TV program
  • Exercise (not necessarily going to a gym but using a DVD or TV program; or take a walk)
  • Engage in a hobby, craft, or activity you enjoy
  • Keep a thought journal
  • Talk to someone
  • Don’t do more than is possible in one day
  • Put things in their place
  • Volunteer
  • Laugh and laugh often
  • Clarify your values and live by them
  • Seek help

It is important to remember that it is okay to put your baby down in a safe place (like their crib) and let them cry for a while.  It may seem cruel, but if you continue to go back and talk to your baby saying, “Mommy needs a little break right now” or “Daddy will come back in a little while and pick you up”, your baby may feel comforted hearing your voice and it still gives you time to relax a few moments.

Don’t ever be afraid to ask for help from family, friends, or even trusted neighbors.  That is another reason that we are here, to be a resource for new moms and answer questions that you may have!

Keep in mind that most people love to help out by holding a baby (yes, even a crying one) for a little while, giving you a much needed break.  If your baby is continually crying at the same time of day for no apparent reason and nothing helps, I encourage you to read our blog post on PURPLE crying. It may just have the answers you are looking for.